Maularia Fist

jolly darkness

jolly darkness

I’ve got no flashlight to shine
while going through the jolly darkness
I’ve got no lighter to unflame
while going through the jolly darkness
I’ve got no matchstick to burn
while going through the jolly darkness
I’ve got no torch to set fire to
while going through the jolly darkness
that’s my mind

it’s dark in this long and lonely hall
been walking for ages through it and
is it now spring or the fall
where will my journey end

can anyone give me the answer
cause I’m about to go in maniac mode
can anyone please tell me and fast
before my other nature takes over

and then I will do desastrous things
throw with anger all the thrash around
and it won’t be over till the fat lady sings
and I will not be there though
cause I’ll be licking my wounds

© Maularia Fist

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Maularia Fist

just a moment

just a moment

it is unheard off, for how far I know
I’m not depressed nor that I feel happy
it’s more a state of being in between
and the days are quickly rather dark

I still know that there is light behind clouds
the sun is shining for everyone
you just have to know it is there – so
I guess I’m in my head to much

is there a spark of light in my heart
or is it the calm before the storm comes
can someone give me answers I can use
that’s all I have to ask myself for now

© Maularia Fist

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Maularia Fist

selfreflection

selfreflection

I’m not quite English enough
to be writing this kind of poetry stuff
so it’s better for me to say I’m Dutch
because it is the truth – and
I just want to embody that

I’m not quite thin
I’m rather a bit fat
but still I’m fine with that
because it makes me more
of a cuddle kind of guy

I’m a legit nice man
who has put his ego aside
my moods are at rest
and fluid like the waves
of the watermirror, I’m gazing in
at least at the other side
they might think that I look thin

© Maularia Fist

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Maularia Fist

still growing

still growing

what….am I….going to do….about it all

sometimes my world’s a mess
going through chaotic and difficult things
at least my mind knows what is best
while having no control over my moodswings
it’ll tell me to take some rest

I know my onw kind of darkness – and
I also know my kind of light
it’s like a whole development has been there
so now I have, on it all, more sight
or at least I might

there’s a force of life in my body
there’s also power emitting from my soul
energy is being poured from all around
and all I have to do is to relax and use
whatever I actually need

© Maularia Fist

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Maularia Fist

fucked up memories

fucked up memories

once I broke the laws of sanity
I don’t know if it was a good idea
but I felt so much more liberated
from burdens and negativity
that everyone around found out
that I have went wrong and insane

lying on my back on the floor
I asked myself if I was to go crazy
and guess what, the answer was yes
and that opened a whole different door
that dissolved into my mind – and
all I know now is that, that wasn’t any good

I lost my mind that day, fully lost it
had no control over what I was doing
it was like a fight between angels and demons
and I felt ghosts everywhere in my house
they broke me piece by piece, till I went on a rage
they slammed the paintings I made of the wall – and
made me do totally random messed up shit

after all the things that I had done I got arrested
a man sought me out and declared stuff
so the mayor was called and let me be sent
to a madhouse in a nearby city
there I got threated, back to be sane
and that’s all I want to share for now

so other’s will know what it is
to be in a state of psychosis

© Maularia Fist

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